10 Strategies to Reduce Commuter Stress

Driving can be one of the most stressful parts of your day. So, reducing your driving stress lessens daily stress--and puts you in a better, less stressed mood when you arrive at work. Below are some de-stressing suggestions. Changing habits, of course, takes time. Pick a couple to work on, rather than attempting to tackle them all at once (if they all apply…). Making new habits takes repetition. You might want to print these out, cut them up, and tape 1-2 on your dashboard (or refrigerator) each week to remind you.

1 Don't play Irish trad tunes while driving, or anything that can get your heart pumping. Music affects your mood, & blood pressure! Put classical or jazz on the radio. Anything with a relaxing beat. Also avoid the negativity of endless news reporting or controversial, fast-taking or otherwise irritating radio shows that can get your ire up.

2. Breathe. Apply mindfulness, an effective stress management strategy, to your driving. Body tension both comes from the mind,and affects the mind. Notice if you are gripping the steering wheel tightly, holding your breath, or feeling tension/pain in your neck, shoulders, or back. If so, take a deep breath, hold a second, and exhale in a controlled slow motion, allowing your hands and arms and shoulders to release some tension. Take a few more long, full calming breaths like this, letting more of the tension in your body release. From time to time, check in with yourself, and repeat.

3. Turn off your phone. Give yourself a retreat from stress-generating multitasking, from distracting or stressful interactions with people not in the car. Savor the freedom of being out of contact with everyone else for a little while. According to AAA, distracted driving accounts for 13 deaths A DAY. Dying in an accident is definitely stressful… Apply mindfulness to your driving—when driving, just drive. Then praise yourself for your powers of self-disciple and responsible driving. Positivity, like praise, reduces stress and engages your prefrontal cortex, allowing you better emotional & impulse control, among other things.

4. Plan ahead—Part of your stress may be due to not getting in the car early enough. Keep your keys (purse, wallet, briefcase) in the same place so you don't waste time hunting for them. Gather whatever you will need to bring with you well in advance. Remember when your mom would lay out your clothes the night before school? Smart lady... You can still choose your outfit the night before. Think about what you can do to get yourself out the door earlier & in a more relaxed condition, so you don't have to worry if you get stuck in bad traffic. (But if you do worry, see 2 above.)

5. Slow down. Ask yourself, “Is it really important to get there as fast as possible? Will it really matter if I am a little late?”

            We can fall into the habit of rushing when we drive, even when there really isn't any reason for it. Driving isn't a race. Recognize when you are starting to feel irritated, anxious, competitive or aggressive while driving, and take a moment to reflect on how much difference a few minutes are really going to make. You can even do some mph/distance calculations.("I'm stuck behind someone going 10 mph slower than I want or normally go. My destination is 4 miles away, and I am about 1 mile away now. I usually go 40, which means 4 miles takes me 6 mins. (1/10 of 60 mins.). At 30 mph for 1 mile, it will take 2 mins. to get there instead of 1.25. Does this make a difference?") Then breath, relax, & slow down…

6. Curb your own aggressive driving--You know what I'm talking about: tailgating, speeding, weaving speedily between other cars, even those already going 10-20 mph over the speed limit, chasing the driver who cut you off a while back, passing on the left (especially on surface roads that are not 2 lanes wide!) 
     These put you in a heightened state of alertness, engaging your body's stress response. Not to mention the shortterm risk of tickets or accidents. They also prompt stress in the other drivers around you, making the road more dangerous and unpleasant for everyone. Slow down, back off from the guy in front of you, especially when you’re both going very fast, chill. See also 2 & 5 above.

7. Avoid negativity, go positive. Are you silently criticizing the stupid drivers around you (maybe even not silently)? Do phrases like, "Some of us have places go be, moron" bounce around in your head? Are you going over a recent argument you had with your spouse? Do you fantasize about how much trouble you will be in when you are late, then believe your fantasies? (In truth, the boss could be late too; you really can’t predict the future…!)

            Negative and judgmental thoughts trigger stress. Negativity also promotes negativity & stress around you. When you notice yourself doing this, turn your thoughts to things you appreciate, love, enjoy... The cute thing your child said at breakfast, the adoring look your dog gives you, the amazing sunset you saw last night... Count your blessings. Look forward to something pleasant, like an upcoming night out, vacation, or the accomplishment of a goal. This will direct your mind to the positive, and the brain cannot be both positive and negative at the same time. Use the drive to practice being more positive and the rest of your life will improve too!

8. Can't be positive? At least try this: Distract yourself from negative thoughts by counting to a hundred by sevens, forwards & backwards. Recite a memorized poem, or prayer, or the first 15 digits of pi. Try to recall something fun from every year of your life. Do anything to keep your thoughts from getting negative. And when you notice that they have drifted back to the dark side, just calmly (nonjudgmentally) say to yourself, “Oh, never mind!”, and return to your distraction plan.

9. Practice kind driving; compassionate imagining. Move your thoughts away from your wants and needs to contemplate those of other drivers. Let someone pass, allow a car waiting to merge from an onramp, be the guy who stops first when someone is standing at a crosswalk. Then bask in the goodness of your act. The generosity of your spirit will improve your mood and that of the other driver (or pedestrian), spreading a little goodwill & making the road safer.

             Other drivers annoying you? Make up compassionate scenarios instead of judging and cursing. The slow car up ahead is a fearful 87-year-old driving to visit her husband in the hospital... The guy talking on his phone, going 5-15 miles under the speed limit, is trying to calm his distraught daughter who just broke up with her boyfriend...

            Finally, work on recognizing that we all space out & get oblivious at times, and that none of the other drivers is doing what they are doing just to piss YOU off.

10. Use the bathroom before you leave.

Elisabeth Carter Ed.M., MFA, completed the training to provide SMART at the Benson Henry Institute in 2015. For information about her Metro-West (Boston) based program, visit www.managemystress.net.